Live life now
Studies have shown that those in the medical field who live life with the “When this is over, then we will….” mentality are unhappy in their relationships and in their job satisfaction. Medical training is a very long process. My husband will have been in school or training for 17 years since high school before he is actually able to practice his chosen specialty. 17 years! He will be almost 40, poor guy.
Aaron and our two daughters at medical school graduation. Our two sons had not yet been born.
7 years later at the end of residency.
When I look at these two pictures, it is so apparent to me how long this process has been. If we had lived all of these years only thinking about when it was over, we would have missed out on a huge portion of our life together.
This idea is especially important for the physician spouse. Clayton M. Christensen addresses this idea in his New York Times best-selling book, “How will you Measure Your Life” (which I recommend, by the way). He explains that many professionals have the idea that if they invest in their careers early on – even at the sacrifice of their families, that they can later go back and reinvest in their family after their career has taken off. He explains that family relationships do not just wait around to be invested in when it is convenient and that those professionals who take this approach often find themselves with broken relationships and unfulfilling careers. It is possible to invest in both. It’s hard, but it is possible. Put your kids in music lessons, take your spouse on that trip you’ve been wanting to take, start running – whatever it is, find ways to live life now and not just wait until all the training is over. Sure the financial piece and the time constraints will factor in, but that doesn’t mean that everything has to be on hold. Certainly, make the effort to spend time together and build relationships with those that matter most. {Lesson8}
