Go out on a weekly date and get away alone together for as long as possible once a year.
Time alone together is crucial! When we started residency, we had two small children. By the time we were finished, seven years later, we had four. Making date nights and getaways a priority was hard, but absolutely essential! We went without a lot of things so we could afford to pay a babysitter and take a trip alone together once a year (See #3). We were fortunate to occasionally have grandparents come stay with the kids when we left, but that was not always feasible. I believe this is the second most important thing we did through residency to make it work (keep reading….my number one suggestion is coming up). That week alone would hold us over well for about six months and then we would feel we needed another one. That’s when we would begin planning and preparing for the next vacation. The anticipation would be enough to get us through the next set of hard months – knowing we had something to look forward to.
Be strategic in the kinds of getaways you take. Most likely both of you will be exhausted. My husband and I love to travel. We would have loved the sightseeing, museum going trips, but we knew that was not what we needed. Most of our vacations were just that – vacations. We tried to make them as easy as possible. Someplace where we could both get some extra sleep, wouldn’t have to work very hard to get what we needed, and could just be together. Cruises are a favorite for this reason. We would always request our own table at dinner and stay for as long as they would let us – just talking. You can always find a good deal on a cruise and in terms of what you get and what you pay, it was perfect for our meager income. The built in romance of a cruise adds to the whole point of getting away in the first place – to reconnect. Our intent was to leave everything behind and just be in love. For us, it always worked. {Lesson 5}
