Family Dinner Time When One Parent Often Works Late

We all know family dinner time is important, but what do you do when one spouse works late most/every night? It can be extremely frustrating to go to all the work of preparing a nice meal, only to receive a phone call saying she is not going to make it home for dinner again. Now you are left serving a nice meal to a handful of unappreciative young children that would have preferred scrambled eggs and pancakes or a peanut butter sandwich.

Related: Family Dinner Time

Demanding or unconventional work schedules require a great deal of flexibility and creativity.  Sometimes, we get stuck thinking things should be a certain way, or they don’t count.  I completely disagree.  Life is about finding what works for each individual family circumstance.  Try some of these suggestions for accommodating busy schedules and family dinner time.  Leave a comment below explaining what creative options you’ve come up with for your family.

Remember, The Purpose of the Task is to Strengthen the Relationship. The purpose of eating family dinner together is not to try a new meal (although that can be fun) or even to enforce your children to eat all their vegetables (although that is important too). The purpose of family meal time is to establish a tradition to build strong bonds and a sense of cohesion and belonging.  

• Allow your meals to be less than perfectly balanced and 100% non-processed.  High standards are admirable, but they can also be suffocating and add a tremendous amount of stress.
• Find healthy, quick meals your children will eat without a fight, so you don’t have to manage a dinner-time battle by yourself.
• When you do prepare a meal, dish up a plate for your spouse and have your kids draw a picture or leave a note about their day.
• Don’t hold dinner hoping she will walk in the door. Feed the kids when they are hungry. If you keep waiting – expecting your spouse any minute, you will have extremely hungry and grumpy kids and a situation ripe for resentment. Pick a dinner time and stick to it – even if your spouse isn’t home.
• If the children are still awake when the other parent comes home, allow them to sit and eat a bedtime snack or dessert while their dad eats dinner. These few minutes allow time to strengthen connections and build relationships.
• If dinner has started, but mom is still on her way home, put her on speaker phone in the middle of the table and allow her to participate in the conversation. This can be tricky with little kids all wanting to talk at the same time, but little games can help regulate the chaos.
• There is no reason why “family dinner time” cannot happen at breakfast time. If your family can be together in the morning, but not in the evening, get up early and gather around the table together before the day begins.

What has worked for your family?